Take Off Your Dockers: Archive

Apr 5th

I'm a bad, bad man...

Dear Friends, It’s my pleasure to invite you to the Manhattan Chamber Opera performance of Bellini’s beautiful opera I Capuleti e i Montecchi. I will sing the role of Tebaldo (“Tybalt” in this extremely liberal adaptation of Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet). Email me at mrcaleb@gmail.com if you want tickets ($20). YOUR full ticket price goes directly to me, and will...

Mar 7th

i hate my blog, but it's so much better with...

Feb 5th

Dec 4th

sarah se puede!

“it would be my honor to assist and support our new president and the new administration…. i speak for other republicans and republican governors, also…. they would be willing also to seize this opportunity that we have to progress this nation together, in a united front” - sarah palin

Nov 13th

5 country ku's

1. Alone at the bar The jukebox heals my heart with Hawaiian guitars. 2. Beyond prison walls Momma cries, beer flows like wine And train whistles blow. 3. I’ve loved, lost, and fished (less than some but more than most) in my flatbed truck. 4. Pondering worn frets He seeks her lost shadow in Rhinestone reflections. 5. I see the bottom Of my heart and my bottle Now that you are...

Nov 6th

pay the lady

it can’t be more than a buck on itunes.

Oct 30th

puppet masters and mistresses

speaking of poets - bobby braddock and harlan howard wrote this: you say that you’re born again / cleansed of your former sins / you want me to say I forgive and forget / but you meant too much to me / don’t you be touchin’ me / why don’t you go touch all those women you’ve met god may forgive you but i won’t / yes jesus loves you but i don’t / they...

Oct 30th

one for my homey

i’ll carefully lift a glass tonight for dylan thomas, born today, 1914. he wrote this. kinda makes me wish my birthday was in october. and that i was a genius poet.

Oct 27th

lists

as david letterman can tell you, lists get old really fast. cracked, though, seems to be able to do lists better than most. The 6 Cutest Animals That Can Still Destroy You will long be near the top of my list of lists - which you will never ever see.

Oct 17th

keep your benefits, dockerboy.

maybe the best part of my day job is my dentist. i couldn’t have a dentist without the day job, but with it, i get to have the best one. seriously. i just gave up toothpaste in hopes that i’ll get to hang out with her more.

Oct 16th

you don't need to take off your dockers, jon arons

seriously, even when they’re on, they’re off.

Oct 10th